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I wish I could just record visual voice mails and send it to them in a convenient manner without having to encode or upload or email anything.

Leaked emails and IMs are bad enough (see Mark Zuckerberg IMs), leaked audio is even worse (see Christian Bale audio Mel Gibson rant), leaked video would probably be devastating.

If you’re government you could get away with it, if you’re a celebrity (Paris Hilton) a sex tape might even help your career, but for the rest of us leaked video would ruin careers and reputations for life.

On one hand they capture much more of what’s in front of them but the downside is they add a bubble like distortion to the image. It shows the same scene shot with both lenses so you can see the difference.(If you’ve always wondered why low budget films, even those shot in HD, don’t quiet look right it’s because the cinematographer or director used wide angle lenses throughout the whole thing, so everything’s in focus and the background becomes distracting, whereas Hollywood films narrow the focus on the subject.)So why don’t laptop web cams and iphone cams use telephoto lenses? Number 1, they’re more expensive and more bulky than wide angle lenses.

Telephoto lenses, on the other hand, show images without distortion but are way too “zoomed in” and compress near and far objects giving a shallow dept of field (subject is crisp, background is blurred) meaning it has to be focused just right or else the subject will be blurry. Number 2, they have a much more shallow depth of field so you either have to hold it the perfect distance away from your face and not move or make one that constantly auto re-focuses, which would get expensive.

But I recently started having semi-regular Skype sex, and realized that I hadn't felt this sexually inept since I was a terrified teenager.